The Nobsons were at the seaside,
The serenity of the sea front stroll and the hustle and bustle of
folk, Nobby and Tommy deemed 'aged', was now replaced by screams, roaring
laughter and a more youthful crowd as people were tossed this way and that on a
variety of contraptions. Machinery
creaked, groaned and whooshed and the whole ambience of the day sped
up. The horror of a laughing
clown encased in a giant glass-cabinet, with a little doppelganger on his knee, almost
hypnotized Tommy and Nobby who were eventually nudged on into the nearby Fun
House where a world of madness and escapism ensued. The boys toppled down a set of shaking
stairs, were sent dizzy by a great spinning wheel, made breathless by many
trips up and down a huge slide and tossed all ways by a rotating barrel that
saw one old dear bravely enter, fall arse over tit and spit out her dentures
right into Nobby’s hollering mouth. This
was horrible enough but the sight of an aging woman with knee-cutting knickers
exposed and spouting obscenities from a toothless orifice was a little too much
to take for the two young tumbling lads.
After having a quick jaunt amid some wobbling barrel towers and running across
a jerk and judder floor they asked if it was time to move on, the visions of
the flashing OAP were still a little too fresh in the memory.
Once outside Nobby noticed that his parents seemed a little
unsteady on their feet and kept passing a large bottle of amber liquid back and
forth, taking a sip and giggling like silly girls. Dad’s flies were gaping and one of mum’s
blouse buttons had popped open, Nobby was too shy to comment even though Tommy
kept nudging him and pointing with a sly smirk.
It was at this point the boys were given their first taste of freedom as
each were given a handful of coins and told to entertain themselves for the next
couple of hours but to be back at the nearby Noah’s
For a paltry fee (a shilling in fact) the boys were given 5 kicks
apiece to try and knock down 3 wooden footballers. The cut-out players were set up in a row of 8
with generous spacing in between and a noticeable weight added to the
base. The oily smirking stallholder took
the proffered coinage and let the lads take their chances. Tommy stepped up first, one ball sent a Man
City clad effigy tumbling, the next hoof flattened a Man Utd player, the third
hit an Arsenal player flush in the face and the last 2 kicks were used on a
rather irate Everton creation who refused to tumble despite a brace of firm
connections. As a prize Tommy chose a
rubber King Kong. Nobby stepped up and
took his punts, the first shot went awry and hit the retailer right in the
globes, the second and third shots brought success, the fourth was skewed and
brought down a heap of stuffed dolls.
The last hoof was directed with firm focus, the face of a Tottenham
Hotspur player was hammered, an uncertain wobble followed, and eventually a tumble
was had – Nobby was delighted, for his prize he chose a Giant Magnet.
Thrilled with their winnings the boys were almost unaware of the
charging time. The clock in the local
‘Have a Laugh Caf’ indicated it was 4.30pm so a quick go on the Dodgems was had
and back to the pre-planned meeting point it was. As the animals went in 2 by 2 to the giant
